Usually my routine day at the office is pathetic and stressful. Overload and underachieved. At 5 o'clock I already waiting in line to punch out attendance, to get away from the work and go home. In the car while driving, I'm unable to reach the full potential of my car speed because i'm getting caught in usual spot of heavy traffic. I always contribute swearing and yelling and not to forget, long honking like teenager with no self-esteem. Who cares actually, we Malaysian. It's a stress and I'm not like it. The only remedy to ease my work-related stress is to see my Amirul's face. Some people said that seeing your children face is like seeing the heaven and if you want to smell the heaven, just smell your children face. Well, it's true. Seeing my child is the key to release all the stress I have from work, but seeing what happen to your home when you open the door of your house, just make you more unbearably stressful.
There are four unlikely situations that I would not like to see when I get home, but it happens very often:
- Earthquake version 7.0 is when the toys, well-organized books, and all small things go scattered and distributed on the floor. Then I see the smiled face at the corner of the living room.
- His tantrum starting to get control over his body and all I see is a zero gravity of my iPod and HTC Touch phone and then they hit the floor.
- Amirul crying out loud, asking to be hugged and lift-off while I'm desperately need for relax and unwind.
- My Amirul smells funny (probably because he sweat too much) and he needs someone to get him showered.
Stress is the way your body responds to situations, circumstances, and other similar aspects to life. Situations pictured above often produce increasing in body temperature, heartbeats twice faster than usual, and temporary loss of strength and energy. To manage the stress, I always follow the below steps:
- Take a deep breath and sit back for 5 minutes is the first step that I take if the usual scene happened when I get home. It is the most traditional way of stress relief and widely practiced by people around the world. Get myself Istighfar and manage the stress easily. Sit down, do nothing, and someone will come like a sunrise, cleaning up the mess; Amirul's mummy.
- Before I let my emotion darkens my mind and soul and react blindly to the situation, I always thinking rationally why it happened and how to solve the problem. Usually if scene number 2 happens, I will bring Amirul to the playground in front of our house, let him play by himself until he's cool down.
- Sometimes, Amirul need someone to play with. Since his unborn sibling is still yet to born, he don't have anyone but me. Routinely, he yells at me as soon as I open my door show the sign of playing In spite of exhaustion I got from my work, I let go of everything I had in mind just to play flying-plane game with him.
- My thoughts are playing with my brain, "I have a bad day, I deserve to relax" or "Let your mum taking care of you". Think too much will only corrupt me. If my Amirul needs to be showered, I, as a father have to act with responsibility. React to the situation rather than thinking too much about my restlessness.
- There is a behavior of Amirul that I really inspired. He loves to help someone. He loves to help mummy cooking even though he couldn't. He loves to help mummy hanging up the washed clothes. He loves to take TV remote for me. I notice that he actually want to assist his daddy and mummy when we ask him. If child-made earthquake version 7.0 has happened in our living room, I ask him nicely to help me cleaning up the mess and he is really helpful in that situation.
Amirul is a cheerfully active toddler and it takes a lot of stress taking care of him. What I need now is a healthy mind to carry on responsibility to be a decent father.